雅思作文 Question:Society is based on rules and laws.It could no

雅思作文
Question:
Society is based on rules and laws.It could not function if individuals were free to do whatever they wanted.To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Answer:
In this world,everyone is restricted by others,rules,policies,and laws,etc,and individuals cannot do everything they want.These rules and laws have made us less free,in terms of live,work,and others:employees must pay the tax to the government.Admittedly,the laws and rules have changed our lifestyle,and make people feel nervous.However,in my opinion,the rules are an indispensable part of this society.
To begin with,it is needed to realize that the rules and laws are usually decided by the public,and some are also relative to the experiences and real needs.Therefore,most of the policies are beneficial to folks.For instance,it is very difficult to imagine an environment which the people can kill others freely without punishment.If everyone could kill the people they hated,there was nobody can be alive at last.Also,if people did not pay any tax to the government,who were like to pay the money to feed the citizens in poverty?Would everyone like to watch these people dying because of hunger or illness?And who has the responsibility to offer us insurance and welfare?Obviously,on the one hand,the laws restrict us a lot; however,on the other hand,these make the live safe and peaceful,and make human more cooperative.
In addition,laws and rules exist since thousands years ago.At that time,kings utilize the laws to organize his citizens and let them obey the kingdom.Thousands years later,the laws are not just used for the benefits for presidents or principals; they are the key of the development and culture of human.
In the end,laws and rules play a pivotal role in the modern society:they contribute the evolution of the entire human race.

应该是一篇7分以上的作文,如果是在考试规定时间内写就的,那作者的词汇量一定很大,但是有些词用的太生僻.用词精炼可以在相同字数内增加作文的宽度,阅卷老师会很impressive.如果开篇先阐明一下你是否同意那个观点,会更好.下面是一些修改(用大写标明）
they contribute TO the evolution...
在这种议论文中多用一些被动语态,更加客观,也会使句子样式多变一些,不枯燥,比如第一段的几处可以改为：
People are given less freedom in their living and work because of the rules and regulations.
第二段：
it needs to be realized that.