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英语翻译Women who had bariatric surgery to lose weight had a 70

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英语翻译
Women who had bariatric surgery to lose weight had a 70 percent lower risk of uterine cancer and an even lower risk if they kept the weight off,according to findings of a study based on more than 7 million hospital admissions being presented at the Society of Gynecologic Oncology (SGO) 妇科肿瘤医师协会Annual Meeting on Women’s Cancer in Tampa,Fla.福罗里达州坦帕市,March 22-25
一项在3月22日至3月25日佛罗里达州坦帕市招开的妇科肿瘤医师协会上被提出的发现指出,接受减肥手术以减轻体重的女性可降低70%罹患子宫癌的风险,且保持体重有助于进一步降低患子宫癌的风险.该发现是基于一项对超过七百万入院患者研究.
这一段总觉得我翻译得怪怪的,我翻的最后一句有点问题看能不能修改一下?还有admission在这里是这个意思吗?
Among the nearly 6.5 million[ admissions] of non-obese women who had not previously had bariatric surgery,32,192 (.5 percent) were diagnosed with uterine cancer.
这一段中的admission应该怎么翻译?
英语翻译Women who had bariatric surgery to lose weight had a 70
1. Women who had bariatric surgery to lose weight had a 70 percent lower risk of uterine cancer and an even lower risk if they kept the weight off, according to findings of a study based on more than 7 million hospital admissions being presented at the Society of Gynecologic Oncology (SGO) Annual Meeting on Women’s Cancer in Tampa, Fla., March 22-25
三月22-25日于 Tampa, Fla.由SGA召开的妇女癌症年会上发表的一项研究显示,根据对医院700万接受减肥手术的病例研究发现,减肥手术可以帮助肥胖妇女减低70%的子宫癌病发率.
2. Among the nearly 6.5 million admissions of non-obese women who had not previously had bariatric surgery, 32,192 (.5 percent) were diagnosed with uterine cancer.
在对近650万的无减肥手术治疗史的非胖妇女病例的调研中,有32,192例(约合0.5%)被确诊患有子宫癌.
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Admission的直接理解是医院接收病人住院,翻译成病历比较顺.