大师作文网请大家帮帮我评判我的英语作文,求职
来源：学生作业帮 编辑：大师作文网作业帮 分类：综合作业 时间：2024/11/10 23:53:05
请大家帮帮我评判我的英语作文,求职
I learned from the newspaper that your company needs an English secretary.My name is Li Hua,a 19 years old boy.I am writing to tell you that I can do this job.I am a student,I will graduate from Xin-Xing Foreign Language School on July.
In the school,I am a good student,I like studying and my favorite subject is English,my English level is also good.I can write article in English and I can speak English fluency with foreigers,and my study result always the A.
I like playing the sports,because I think do exercise is very important,it make me feel powerful
,and I can do all the thing in a day,including the work.I can play the violin,the violin makes me relaxed.
I am outgoing and friendly with everybody.I like talking with people and making friends with them.The secretary should be friendly q and patient.So I think this job is suit for me,and I also hope do something for the company.
Last,I am looking forward to your rely me .
I learned from the newspaper that your company needs an English secretary.My name is Li Hua,a 19 years old boy.I am writing to tell you that I can do this job.I am a student,I will graduate from Xin-Xing Foreign Language School on July.
In the school,I am a good student,I like studying and my favorite subject is English,my English level is also good.I can write article in English and I can speak English fluency with foreigers,and my study result always the A.
I like playing the sports,because I think do exercise is very important,it make me feel powerful
,and I can do all the thing in a day,including the work.I can play the violin,the violin makes me relaxed.
I am outgoing and friendly with everybody.I like talking with people and making friends with them.The secretary should be friendly q and patient.So I think this job is suit for me,and I also hope do something for the company.
Last,I am looking forward to your rely me .
看到了不少的语法错误.
English level这种表达我没见到过,如果可以的话可以换成ability
speak english fluency这句话中fluency是名词,应当换成fluently
第二段最后一句,可以改为I always score an A during my English study
do exercise应该改成doing exercise
and i can do all the thing in a day这句话有表达问题,你的意思应该是效率很高,可以改为and my efficiency is high.
including work改为including working
the violin makes me relaxed.改为 it makes me feel relaxed
还有就是第二段的段意表述并不是很明确,点和点之间没有过渡,可以说没有什么关联,应当注意
so i think is job is suit for me 改为 suitable
hope to do
结尾的话i am looking forward to your best regards.
English level这种表达我没见到过,如果可以的话可以换成ability
speak english fluency这句话中fluency是名词,应当换成fluently
第二段最后一句,可以改为I always score an A during my English study
do exercise应该改成doing exercise
and i can do all the thing in a day这句话有表达问题,你的意思应该是效率很高,可以改为and my efficiency is high.
including work改为including working
the violin makes me relaxed.改为 it makes me feel relaxed
还有就是第二段的段意表述并不是很明确,点和点之间没有过渡,可以说没有什么关联,应当注意
so i think is job is suit for me 改为 suitable
hope to do
结尾的话i am looking forward to your best regards.