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Hi,I'm Frank,I'm a student .In my family ,my father is a doc

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Hi,I'm Frank,I'm a student .In my family ,my father is a doctor .He works in a hospital .He always go to work by car for 30 minutes.He is very busy.My mother ha an interesting job,she works at a radio station.She usually takes the bus to work,it takes her 20 minutes.Every day ,I must get up early,because my home is far from the school .I always ride my bike to school for 15 minutes 我们老师说这篇作文有四个地方错了.麻烦英语大神帮我看看,顺便加上为什么错
Hi,I'm Frank,I'm a student .In my family ,my father is a doc
1) in my family 是多余的
2) It takes him 30 minutes to go to work by car.
3) My mother has an interesting job. She works.
4) It takes her about 20 minutes to go to work by bus
5) It takes me 15 minutes to go to school by bike.
这样重写似乎好点:
Hi, I'm Frank. I'm a student. My father is a doctor. He works in a hospital. He always goes to work by car. It takes him 30 minutes to go there by car. He is very busy. My mother has an interesting job. She works at a radio station. She goes to work by bus and it takes her about 20 minutes. I must get up very early every day because my school is very far from my home. I always to go to school by bike and it takes me about 15 minutes to go there.
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