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自己写了个小短文,错误多多,最好能简单说下为何错了,

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自己写了个小短文,错误多多,最好能简单说下为何错了,
Today is Sunday and have no important things.
My classmate ane I take exercise on the afternoon.
First of all,we have plaied badmintoon for one hour.In fact,I think our level is
not bad.Because I have felt very well when I hit every balls.and that I can use left hand
expect for right hand.My classmate is the same as me.
After that We have plaied chinese chess.Actually,we are not often play it.our level
is very low.Even nobody can see us over one minute.most of them only sighed deeply and
waved their heads and then go quick away.I fell some shy...Though we aren't good at
it,but we are good happy.Finally our score is 2:2.
Yeah!we are two happily ...
ps:最后想说臭棋娄子...不知道应该如何说...
自己写了个小短文,错误多多,最好能简单说下为何错了,
It was Sunday,nothing really special today.
My classmate came and we did exercise in the afternoon.
First,we played badminton for about one hour.I think we played quite well.I felt so good each time I hit the shuttlecock.I can even played with my left hand.And so did my classmate.
Next,we played Chinese chess.To tell you the truth,we don’t play it quite often.So we are not that good.When we played,nobody would bother to watch us play at all,not for even one minute.They stopped and went,signing,then shaking their heads.
I felt a little bit embarrassed.Though we weren’t good at
chess,the most important thing was that we did have a good time.Our final score was 2:2.(Tied)
Yeah!We are two happy chess pieces!
天哪地哪哇:1.首先表扬你自己把这篇故事写完.这是一篇完整的故事,有时间,有人物,有活动,有描述.下次若能再多加些自己的感受就更好了.
有几个小问题要注意:1.写当天做过的事,最好用过去时态:简单,清楚.很多时候中文表示已经做的事,在英文里并不是要用完成时态来表达的.
2.尽量多看英文原文.感觉你的表达方式很多还是用中文的思维表达方式,如水平底(level is low)等.今后看到好的词组,可以把它们记在一个小本子上,写作时拿出来看,就有现成的了.
3.写叙述文时,你可模仿这个模式:One day---First---Next---Then---Finally
4.你今天要记的单词:羽毛球shuttlecock,摇头shake(shook) one’s head
5.文章要有题目(title)
最后,keep up the good job!