请高级英语翻译批评指正.

请高级英语翻译批评指正.
材料采购前,我们将首先对材料供应商进行审核,确定合格供应商,方可使用,同时我们将工程图纸送至设计院进行审核签字盖章确认,之后由技术质量部依据图纸编排材料明细表,然后要求材料计划员依据图纸编制采购计划,排版图,方可采购.材料进厂后,存放在指定的场地,有材料工程师、检验员、保管员、理化试验员对材料外观,化学成分和机械性能进行检验.任何不符合要求材料,严禁进入仓库.符合要求的材料,我们将在保管和使用中对其进行分类摆放,并做有标记,领取时需严格按照领用程序.
First of all, Material suppliers shall be evaluated before approval for use and we start to purchase them after checking and approvement, meanwhile engineering drawings will be sent to the design institute for further approvement with their signature and stamp, after that, technical department will establish a list of materials according to the engineering drawing and arrange material planner to work out a purchase plan, then purchase. Materials will be stored in the pointed site after entering the company, at the same time, the shape, chemical elements and mechanical performance of materials will be tested and analyzed by material engineer, material inspector, warehouse keeper and tester of physical testing and chemical analysis. Any unqualified materials will not be allowed to store in the warehouse and qualified materials are arranged in to categories with different marks, the use of materials shall be in strict accordance with the procedure of materials drawing.
这段翻译的怎么样。

Before the acquisition of materials, we will first carry on the verification procedure with the material suppliers, make sure the qualification of the suppliers are determined. Simultaneously, we will deliver the project blueprint to the Design Institute for verification, as well as signed and sealed confirmation. Afterwards, the Technical Quality Department will arrange detailed materials list based on the blueprint, then requesting the material planning personnel to establish a purchase plan and the typesetting chart depending on the blueprint. Only then we will carry out the purchase.After the materials enter our plant, they will be discharged at a designated area having the materials engineer, the inspector, the storage personnel, the physics and chemistry test personnel to examine the outward appearance, the chemical composition and the mechanical property of the materials. Any materials which do not conform to the required standards are refused to enter the warehouse. For the materials which do meet the required standards, they are to be arranged, stored and used in categories with tags. The drawing of materials must strictly conform with the drawing procedure.
你那个翻译的很好,我的这个很多地方不如那个,还是翻译出来供你参考.
基于这是一篇介绍流程的文章,我觉得把事情说明白是最重要,你的样本中and多了一些,显得事情发生的程序不那么清楚,尽量把and处理好,先后顺序写好.
另外尽量表达清楚哪一个部门有怎么样的职责,这样也会帮助条理清楚.例如我假设了技术质量部管理材料计划员,把它拆成了两句.
把一些步骤描述得专业些,表达清楚做这个程序的目的,也会帮助理解,并增强可信性.
另外很对不起的是,我不知道排版图应该怎么翻译才正确,你的样本中也没有翻这个词,我不知道我写的typesetting chart对不对.希望帮的到你.